A wooden box with ashes

This is what´s left of my beloved dog…

My heart is broken and my eyes filled with tears.

Life is so cruel and unfair!!!

I just needed 4 more days to get her back home alive!

She was so full of life that last day, and the next day she was gone!

She died in less than 20 hours from first symptoms! And the symptoms were mild! Just a little discomfort in the evening, little pain in the abdomen during the night and lack of apetite. That´s all!

I watched over her during that night and checked her colours and her belly and thought she was suffering from pancreatitis. Or something else curable.

We went to the vets in the morning. She got painkillers and was given the drip.

They even took blood samples and the result shocked me. All the organs were affected…My mind refused to believe it. We were told to leave her there, quiet and half sleeping and collect her in the evening.

But she died before I had a chance to come back and hold her paw!

And thank her for all what she had given me during these 11 years…

My head is full of questions, cannot think about anything else!

What was it that could kill her in such a short period of time??? And where she could have found it??? Will we ever know?

The vet who made a necropsy thought it was a poison for rats. In Sweden it wouldn´t be possible, but in Spain the farmers are careless and throw the poisons around with no respect for environment. But I thought I had watched over her all the time. The dogs were never out of sight!

I don´t know if I will be able to go back there again. And live without fear…

My sweet puppy forgive me for not being able to watch over You well enough and for not being able to bring You back home safe! I´m so sorry!

First puppy pic

These eyes, always watching me

Beautiful teenager

Oh how I will miss these eyes

FAREWELL MY BEAUTY, I`LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!

Tough beginning

I am still in Spain.

There are only a couple of weeks left until we start our long travel back home.

But nothing really matters to me right now, I feel completely empty.

These last months have been filled with a sense of loss and grief.

First I lost Sofia, the cat that always was the first one to come to meet me in our Spanish house. A bit skinny this year I thought. Few weeks later we had to go to the vet to say last farewell. She was dying and there was nothing else we could do for her. Even my dogs must have understood she was sick because they allowed her to come into the house.

I don´t know what it was and why but she was a very special creature to me. Now I just have her portrait on the wall…

Just a couple of weeks later I found out that one of my dearest people on this Earth was diagnosed with a lung cancer.

My cousin Ala, my best friend since early childhood has passed away in Februari. I know it doesn´t have much to do with my dogs but yes, in a way it does She spent with us almost every summer these past years helping me with their training or just keeping us company.

My dogs adored her as much as I did. I don´t really think I´ll ever be whole without her…

On the picture with my previous dogs, all of them gone now… I hope they have welcomed her there, on the other side.

As it wasn´t enough with the pain of my soul I got some physical pain as well. And the real one! This again isn´t about my dogs but yes, it has a great impact on their well-being!

The problems with my spine have worsened a lot during past weeks. As to the point that walking even 100 m with my dogs was on the edge of inability. Despite all the drugs I took every morning. Every step I made was a battle.

I´m using past tense because I went to a Spanish orthopedist who had a mercy on me and give me two pain-blocking injections. It works now quite well but I don´t know for how long. The problem that cause the pain has to be solved by surgery. There is no other way.

Now, back to the dogs. Their life has been rather bored the past weeks. Not even that we aren´t able to train but our long walks has been drastically shortened.

They all have had their birthdays recently and now I have two real veterans. Not that it is something very visible.

The Border Collie, now 9 years old, runs with her sticks as usual.

Ruda, now 11 years, is very fit and moving freely but doesn´t make more effort than necessary. She would still be very engaged when training, as her appetite has reached the very top, but she wouldn´t lose her energy on unimportant things, like, for example, chasing birds on the beach. And now when I feel bad and walk slowly she just keeps the same tempo. Always close to me…

And then my little donkey Brita. Always very alert and watching the street cats with an interest far over the normal. Always ready to chase them here in the village or in the mountains, especially during the night. My dogs wear light collars at night and I can see her light moving high up. She is an expert on these mountains like a mountain goat. Well, her real name is Cabrita…

She is 5 years old now.

I wanted to end this post here.But before I managed to publish this blog a new disaster happened.

As though my task for this year is getting used to lose the most beloved creatures in my life…

Yesterday my husband was forced to let my wonderful, wise and lovely cat Xenon move over the rainbow bridge. Brain tumor. He´s been unwell for some time but I hoped he will wait until I come home and cure him with my love.

Coming back home won´t be easy this year…

The end of summer

Another beautiful summer has come to an end. We are packing our belongings and planning yet another trip to Spain very soon.

The summer has been exceptionally long, warm and busy. Very successful as well. Not only on the competition ground but in the garden as well. Lots of veggies and fruits were produced this year, thanks to an unusually mild temperatures.

Although the weather is still nice and the colors of fall spectacular, it´s time to move to a more friendly place for the winter which will come here anytime and without a warning.

Despite the warm weather we trained quite a lot this summer. And best of my trio was my wonder-dog Ruda. Her speed and engagement scares me sometimes as I am aware that her physical abilities must have decreased now when she is already over 10 years old.. But she so desperately wants to get the rewards that she attempts to make the extreme effort to get them. Well, I have to think twice. Warm her up carefully and choose the easiest exercises, without risking injuries. She doesn´t have any thought about quitting!

Prima is, as usual, very eager to do anything I ask her for. She is just this fantastic dog that never have bad days. She wakes up happy every morning and goes to bed exhausted and happy every evening loading batteries for another happy day. It makes me smile to watch her living the best life ever!

Then there is Brita. I was supposed to compete with her in obedience class 2 this fall but I don´t really feel prepared. It´s not a problem to teach her all the new exercises but her speed and engagement it´s not really there. At least not on the level I would like it to be. I know she can do a lot better but somehow I´m still trying to find the way to change her attitude. So I have to go back to the beginning and speed her up. She is still young, there is no rush. I only hope it wouldn´t have to take such a long time like with her mother….

Except obedience training we enjoyed swimming in the lake almost every day through the whole summer. The precious memories are captured in the photos I really like to share. Now we´ll have to wait until the next season and hope we are all fit and healthy.

As mentioned before we are now loading for the long trip. Every year I have to overcome this overwhelming feeling of fear when I think about this almost 4000 km long journey. Driving alone with the dogs. Traffic jams in Germany. The rain and the darkness. Sometimes even snow storms. I always try to be smart and choose the best solutions but the reality is unpredictable.

But I have made it three times already. I hope for the best but I`m prepared for the worst. I´ll do it again! Why shouldn´t I?

Never give up!

I don’t really understand what happened yesterday on the competition ground but my dream came true! We did it!

Ruda got her third excellent in obedience class 3 and the title of Swedish Obedience Champion!

And what a fantastic performance it was! Not only has she gained 293 points of 320 possible but she was best of all the competitors, and there was 17 of them!!!

At the age of 10 years she ruled out the bunch of young Border Collies that usually take the highest scores!

But the most important thing is that she performed with joy! She was happy between the exercises with my verbal rewards, jumped like a puppy and smiled! Yes, dogs can smile!

And, of course, I did not make any mistakes myself. As I got the last starting number I was so exhausted of waiting that I couldn’t feel any stress anymore.

And the weather was on our side too, cloudy but no rain, just perfect!

Oh, I can’t express how happy and proud I am! Of both of us!

Last year I was about to give up trying. I started to doubt it was possible for us to achieve the goal. On the other hand, knowing how good she was I just couldn’t let it go without giving it one more chance. So I tried again in May and she got her second excellent which cheered me up enormously!

Now with just one more needed I had to give it a try! And the result speaks for itself! Finally she showed the best of her on competition!

I’m so happy I didn’t give up on her and that we had that moment of triumph after hundreds of hours spent on the training ground!

So now Ruda has become a pensioner like me, an active one, like myself. She loves training so we will continue doing some things but avoiding physically demanding exercises, remembering that she is an old lady after all!

And now I can finally focus more on her daughter preparing her for class 2 competition. Would be nice to leave class 2 behind us during this season.

Yeah, let’s see if I’ll manage to fulfill this plan as well!

Another year has passed

I am back in Sweden, trying to make the best of it, despite the terrible weather that chocked us all!

Winter in the end of April! According to meteorologists quite normal for this part of the world, but just not what we all expected!

Since a whole year has passed from my last post I wouldn’t even think of trying to fill the gap.

There was one summer, one fall and one winter in between. Quite ordinary. Nothing unusual happened in that time except the fact that we all got a bit older. But this is normal.

First Prima, the Christmas baby, celebrated her 8th birthday.

Then Ruda, a mature lady now, became 10 years old! Fortunately it doesn’t seem to bother her much!

And in March the puppy had her 4th birthday! Maybe it’s about time to stop calling her a baby?

The winter was spent in Spain, third time in a row. From the beginning of November until the end of March we enjoyed sunny and warm days while people here in Sweden experienced one of the toughest winters in recent years.

I’m so grateful I can leave all this behind and live my life as I like it! Outside as much as possible, without freezing and without snow!

I think the doggies are happy too even if we don’t follow the same style of life as we do at home. I still haven’t found a space to train obedience reasonably close to the village we live in. There are some places I could adapt for training by cleaning piles of dog poo first, and sometimes I did, but it just wasn’t so appealing. And somehow everyday training, which is such an essential part of our life here, isn’t that necessary there.

We have our walks with some of the neighbours and friends from the village.

We make short trips to explore new places in the area and are getting more and more impressed!

After a very dry and hot summer here in Andalusia some rain has fallen in the end, letting wild flowers to explode!

In a very short time the brown was replaced with green and the lake of Viñuela was recollecting its water reserves.

Oh! And we have got a new friend in the house! Well I should rather say I got a friend because the dogs, especially the two Belgians would like to do everything to keep the bloody cat away!

But she is clever, very smart. She makes small steps and the dogs are more and more allowing. We will see what happens next year! She doesn´t have a home, her owners moved away and left her behind. But she knows how to provide the food for herself so I don´t worry for her!

I miss my Spanish life but now we are here and trying to adjust to a different tempo of life. We wouldn´t be able to survive the extremely hot Spanish summer anyway!

A lot has been done in the garden and there is a lot to be done.

Slowly we are coming back on the training ground and check if there won’t be very shameful to start in some spring competitions with Ruda. I haven’t given up the dream about the champion title and she is still very fit and willing! I’ll give it a try!

Brita has to polish some exercises from class 2 so I need some time to prepare her. Last fall she competed in class 1 with an excellent result, got almost 300 points of 320 possible.

Right now it´s a bit complicated to find time to train as much as I would like.

The garden needs a lot of my attention and energy now but I´m trying to do my best! I always start the day with a walk and training and then continue in the garden, so the dogs get the best of me.

This is the very first time I have done updating on my phone. The pictures aren´t that good but the work could be done much quicker!

Who knows, I may repeat the same procedure before another year passes away.

I wonder how we were able to live without our smartphones once!

La primavera

I have been walking here in this beautiful place at least 3 times a week during past 5 months and very soon I shall pack my belongings and return home. I wonder, as usual, how it is possible that all this time spent here just vanished in one second? It must be because I love being here? And how it is possible that I didn´t find a moment to update my blog even once? Is it because I´m always busy doing something more important?

Anyway, here I am trying to write something in English though my head is full of Spanish words. Learning this complicated language has become my new hobby and I can see a reasonable improvement since last year. But I have a looong way ahead before I can manage to say what I wish to say and how I would like to say it.

My dogs enjoy being here as well. I haven´t been able to find a place to train obedience but somehow we can survive without it. Instead we walk a lot in the mountains, on beaches and around my favourite lake of Vinuela.

We have also become a part of the family in the little village where we live, or so it feels for me anyway.

I know all the neighbours, dogs and even cats. I have been helping feeding the street cats here and they are not afraid of me anymore. There is one woman here who had opened her heart for unwanted cats and ended up with about 20 of them. It feels so right to be able to support her!

Some of the cats are tame, some of them half wild but they all come out when they see me. Some would like to follow me home but my dogs have shown an absolut lack of hospitality!

The weather has been a bit unpredictable this winter. At least when I compare with last year. We had some very cold periods a bit unusual for Andalusia. I have seen snow on the nearest mountain quite often this year. And now, the whole March has been unusually hot.

March last year was a bit cold and wet, this time we have been swimming every day, the dogs in the lake and I in our pool. Every day the temperature has been well above 20 degrees. Like Swedish summer.

The only thing that worries me is the lack of water. Not only for the plants in my little garden but generally. Since I came here in November it rained a couple of days in middle December and half a day in February. That´s all.

The dogs have been very healthy and balanced all the time. No worries, just pure happiness.

Only lately I noticed Ruda had worms and had to deworm them all earlier than planned. I always do it just before we return home from travelling abroad but I suppose I have to do it once more time this year and keep doing it twice every time we are here.

They all had their Birthdays while being here.

Prima turned 7 in December.

Then Ruda turned 9 in February

And little Brita is now 3 years old!

On our walks we sometimes have company of two chicos living across the street - a chihuahua Bruto and a some kind of Spaniel Roy.

I must say I am impressed by Brutos strong personality and Roys infinite patience with this little guy. The boys sometimes follow us on our walks in the nearest area without their owner.

Well, I could say I made friends among people here and my girls among the dogs but that partially would be a lie. The girls hardly accept them though finally the boys have learned to show a total respect.

I try to convince myself that it will be nice to return to Sweden, resume our normal activities, rejoin the family and old friends back at home. But it is hard to leave all the new friends and places we enjoy so much!

Life is about making choices and it´s never easy.

I will miss the paths around Vinuela, sound of singing birds, nightly frog concerts, ringing bells of grazing goats , the sea waves and SUN!

Everyone says summer in Andalusia is unbearable so we are so lucky to be able to take the best of two different worlds! Lets enjoy beautiful Swedish summer then!

See You soon sunny Andalusia!

Fall again

I have had an urge need to update my blog for quite some time. Haven´t found an inspiration though until now.

In the meantime the whole summer has swished by and I already planned my journey to Spain in every detail.

It will be so nice to leave Sweden before it gets very unfriendly for people who like to spend their life outside.

Like me.

We have had a wonderful summer this year, as almost every summer here recently. For me and my dogs it was too hot most of the time so I didn´t train them as much as I would like to.

Instead we worked on basic condition of all four of us by swimming every day across our lake and back and walking in the forest. The rest of the time and energy was consumed by the work in the veggie garden and social life. And learning Spanish every day.

Both Prima and Ruda were spayed at the beginning of July so they needed also some time off to rest and heal afterwards. Both were very quick with recovery.

After last year bad experience I had no plans to compete with any of my dogs this year. I lost my motivation and did not believe I was good enough as a trainer. And then I had a long break when I was in Spain. But I did not give up my dream totally. I am a trainaholic after all!

So I started to teach Ruda and Prima some new exercises from the new class 3 program. And noticed it wasn´t so hard I thought it was. Soon there was only directed retrieve that Ruda had some troubles with. So I signed her for 3 competitions and, yes!!! on the last one she got her first excellent!

Oh how I needed this one!

Picture taken during competition by my friend Lotta

I was extremely proud of her and so happy because I almost lost my faith in us as a team! I had a feeling that despite all my efforts I couldn´t see any results when it was needed. She was getting much better on the training ground but somehow it wasn´t showing on the competitions.

Generally the program is getting more and more difficult and the judges are more and more demanding but I have never had an ambition to represent the country on World Obedience Championships! This level is only reachable for Border Collies and some very special ones.

I just wanted to get 3 excellent results to get a Swedish Champion title and I always believed we were able to get there!

Now, with our first excellent I still hope we can do it! Well, we are fighting against time as Ruda will be 9 next year but I hope she is going to maintain her good condition and will to perform. We will try again in the spring!

Little Brita has been approved in the lowest class obedience and may now compete in class 1. Not so many new things to teach when it comes to the exercises but she has some problems with speed.

Very intense in daily life, on her first competition she gained just enough points to pass because of being too slow. Which means I have to change a lot of my criteria and find a way to speed her up without her getting too excited. Not an easy task for me to find the exact level of activity and avoid any unwelcome sounds! But I have a plan!

And Prima? Yes, she is doing quite fine! I do not have any plans to compete with her any more as she reached the goal already but we train every day as usual and play a lot, which she loves.

After being castrated she has not shown any aggressive behaviour towards Ruda and I really, really hope that it will stay this way forever.

She is such an easy going dog and a happy soul, really the easiest dog I ever had! I don´t ever need to use a leash, she would never get in any troubles and always obeys every command. But, I suppose, nobody is perfect! She does not see other dogs, they are just like air to her, the only one she wants to wipe out from the world is Ruda, her best friend! I hope that now we put the end to it!

During the summer our family has been enriched with two puppies!

Both my daughter and my niece bought an Australian Cattle Dog / Kelpie mix, a female and a male from the same litter. Must say I am in love with these puppies as much as my dogs hate them. Especially my daughter´s Sheila. She is just a pure energy ball, always ready to explode! Always happy and very social! But she does not take a no for the answer! When she wants to play she doesn´t care how the others feel about it!

So when she comes in my dogs pretend they are not there!

Sheila with a constant smile on her face

Sheilas brother Buddy, a serious one

It´s too early to plan anything and I must say that the only breed I am really interested in is Laekenois but… With years passing by I am getting forced to admit that Belgian Shepherds are too demanding for my worn-out spine and my aching muscles. If I am to train dogs, and that´s what I`d love to do as long as I live, I have to change the breed. There are Border Collies, of course, that are much lighter that my dogs but somehow I would prefer a Kelpie! Perfect size and perfect working abilities, maybe a perfect choice for me?

We will see what the future offers! Right now I have enough to take care of!

Back home

In the end of March it was time to leave sunny Spain and head back home to Sweden. It is the time when our garden needs intensive attention as the growing season usually begins in April. I thought I had to get ready!

Well, actually, I could have waited until the end of April! It has been a very cold spring and the only plants that I could make grow was tomatoes and peppers inside of the house.

Leaving Spain was harder than I thought it would be. Loved being there! I will miss our walks on the beach and exploring new tracks in the mountains.

Thanks to all the pictures I had taken I can easily go back and experience the best moments again.

In the meantime the little puppy Brita celebrated her second birthday and, as usual, I found it difficult to believe. I thought time would slow down now when I am retired but I have the feeling that it flies even faster?

A mature lady now but still happy and playful when she has a chance and calm and patient when needed. I´m so happy with this puppy! Such a pity she cannot be used in breeding! She could be an excellent mother!

Coming back to Sweden as early as at the end of March has given me the opportunity to see all the signs of approaching spring - from a few snow storms in the beginning until the blossom of apple trees right now.

All the hard work in the garden is finished now, all the seeds and cuttings are in the soil and all the peppers and tomatoes are out in the greenhouse. Whats left now is just everyday fight with the weed and the snails. And praying for some sun! I cannot do so much more. Now it´s up to the plants and it´s tough! Nights are still very cold and I really I hope for a change soon!

The very first visit we made after coming home was at my sister´s place on the countryside. There we met a new member of the family , a puppy called Maggi, a Cocker Spaniel mix. A very strong character together with enormous energy reserves isn´t going to make my sister´s life easy…

Except gardening I continue training obedience with the dogs almost every day. Mostly in the morning, before I lose the rest of my energy in the garden.

We are making progress in learning new exercises in class 3 with Ruda and Prima and preparing Brita to start in the lowest classes. If everything goes as planned I will try to compete again in the fall.

A month ago I have decided to find another home for Prima. She attacked Ruda, unprovoked again, on four different occasions, twice in Spain and twice here at home. Any stress or excitement, positive or negative, may trigger her attack. And I know this will happen again…

I have not been seeking a new home for her actively, I just told friends around hoping inwardly that I will not find a right person. I just cannot imagine giving her away. Right now everything works well between them. I can see some stiff bodies sometimes, now on both sides, but this is something I can handle. The next thing is to have them spayed as the first attacks came just before Prima coming into season. I hope that would help! Yes, I admit, I am an incurable optimist!

I appreciate so much being here in Sweden during the springtime! Nowhere in the world the sky is so blue and the green colour is so green as here!

Welcome SPRING!